Life is a dance we must learn

I can't stop listening to this song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3L5WitGvF2U&feature=youtube_gdata_player
It has a simple and sweet lyrics. Nima and I have started watching this English tv series called Forsyte Saga which is about life, love and relationship. I love the song at the end of each episod. Here is the lyrics.

Life is a dance we must learn
Into the night we will turn
Time holds the secrets of our song
Moments are given, then gone
Come have this dance with me darling
I'll hold you tight till the dawn
Let the night see how I love you
So the moon can tell the sun
One more time around the sky
Kiss each tear that you have cried
Soon the day will tell everyone
I'll love you till I die
Look at your hair flowing in the night
Look at your lips in this light
Just let me kiss them this one more time
Nothing was ever so right

Hang in there Little One

I came out of the building that suddenly I heard a man behind me said "look it's still up there".  I looked at the tree and say a young raccoon hanging the very end of the up-most branch. It was a windy day with strong gust of 100 km/hr. The Baby raccoon hanged tightly to that branch with closed eyes. "She is probably scared to come down" A man said. "Yeah, maybe she is waiting till night when no body is around" I replied. "I'll check up on him tomorrow morning and if he was still here I'll  call for help."
"Hang in there little one" I said to myself. the day after I came back there was no sign of her.

Thanks Apple

I love my iPad. This beautiful piece of technology is just perfect for blogging in bed just what I am doing right now. I was looking into my gmail drafts. I saved few poems or writing that I liked as a draft. I was reading through till I saw one email dated back to 7 month ago. I wrote the email to a very dear friend who asked me something but I never sent the response. I just felt I shouldn't. I remember writing my response with so much care to avoid any heart feeling or misunderstanding but still after finishing the letter I couldn't sent it. It didn't feel right. Still I am not sure if I should have pressed the send button or not.
There is another draft written to the editor of a journal. That one I should have definitely sent. Here is a lesson for myself next time I will express my opinion with self confidence. Promise

Tomorrow with my boss I am heading to a site to audit a tunnel construction. Believe it or not I can not find a pair of safety rubber boot with steel toe protection for myself. I checked several stores and the last one told me quite searching. A young guy who was trying to help me told me here there are none for women. All of the available safety rubber boots are for men and the smallest size is too big for me. I am going down the shaft climbing down a vertical ladder 20 m long I can't afford falling heavy boot in the air. Down the tunnel is always muddy and regular safety boot doesn't do the job for me.
After googling for a long time I finally found a pair of rubber safety boot for female which was design for fire fighters. I was so excited and ready to order till I realize that they currently don't ship anything to Canada. My next hope is to find. Steel toe guard to attach to my regular boots. I can't be the first female with small feet inspecting tunnels here in Toronto or am I?!!!

Entry for April

These days everything are kind of quite. Nima and I enjoying spring and cant wait for summer. I like my new work place, what I am doing, my colleagues, all.   I am 32 now, no kids and have no plan for a one. My parents never push us for a grandchild but recently my dad started asking about it :). He is so funny when trying to ask but not to push. It's a big deal raising a child and I don't see that in myself. I don't want to have a baby just for the sake of not being alone when I am getting older. Well I guess I will feel like it when it's about time hopefully before it's too late.

Innovative Soul

I

I wanna be that lamp.

Happy Norooz

March 20 at 1:15 am spring came to northern hemisphere. We have been lucky in Toronto with warm weather of 24/25 degree. Earth is alive again. I prepared our 7c table. I came home the other day and find this beautiful hyacinth push away the curtain to reach the sun.
I wish you all a spring full of joy, good news, health, wealth (why not)...

 Happy Norooz

Fruits of Life - Part II

When I was 15. back in high school I had a very nice geometry  teacher. In my class we were only 19 students. He told us once "Kids I am telling you, the best friendship for a lifetime are happening during these years, behind these desks. Look at me now, after all these years being grown up and all that, still when I feel blue I go to a bank where my old friend from high school works there.

I had the same classmate from pre-high school (3 years) to the end of high school (4 years). 7 years from age of 11 to 18 gave me a chance to develop strong bounds with some of my classmates. I don't know how but still at the age of 32 when I see my classmates I became that kid again. Nadia is one those pre-high school/high school friends that we keep in touch. Last time I saw her it was after my wedding (5 years ago). She couldn't make it to my wedding and came to see me after. I always loved her for her pure kind heart as big as Pacific ocean.

She lost her mom 6 years ago in an accident couple of days after her younger sister's wedding. Another sister of her was in a car and seriously injured. Nadia was really strong getting over her loss and helping her dad to put the family together. She did her best to help out her sister to recover from her serious injuries. I always loved her for being so generous.

I am really bad with phone calls, one of my big flaws I guess. I sent her emails once in a while but the internet inside Iran is always slow and shaky. She couldn't always check her e-mails or reply me back. Couple of weeks ago I finally called her up on her cell.She recognized my voice after a hi.

"Hiva, is that you? How are you doing girl? what's new? have a baby yet?" Nadia said excited.
"No baby yet" I replied.
"Idiot what are you waiting for?" She said.
"How about you Nadi, any boyfriend yet?" I asked.
"No boyfriend yet" She replied.
"Idiot what are you waiting for?" I said.
"I missed you so much." "I missed you too."

And just like that we continued talking. After almost 3 years that we haven't talk, after almost 5 years that we haven't seen each other, when we talked it was like never this gap existed. It was like we have been together just yesterday. This is a kind of bound that I like.  The trust in our friendship with Nadia. After all these years still at the age of 32 I know I can pick up the phone. Call her up and just talk about my day. Nadia is one of the sweetest fruit of my book life.

Good Stuff

Finally after a long time today I had a chance to chat with my cousin (Behi) and her lovely husband. Before I came to Canada we all lived in Tehran and hang out all the time. We were very close, still are despite the long distance. Have you ever had a friend in your life that you didn't need to explain yourself to her/him. She/he just knows what you mean by few words. Have you ever had a friend in your life that just sitting next to him/her makes you feel much better. Behi was/is that person in my life.
When Mr Behi join the club I couldn't be happier. He was my gadget guru, book guru, technology guru..We used to sit and talk for hours about our favorite topics.
Today he told us about this cool gadget "fitbit". It is the same size as a memory stick. You put it in your pocket and this cool piece of technology track your daily activities and tell you about how your week was in terms of acitivies you've done. He also bought this "Wi-Fi Smart Scale" that track your weight, % body fat, and BMI over time and sync your weight data to your Fitbit.com account through your wireless network.I think I know what to buy Nima for Valentine. ;)

Happy New Year

Nima and I went for one week trip to Punta Cana in Dominican Republic this new year holiday. This is our second sun destination travel after Cozumel Island. I loved it. Beautiful sun, tropical vegetation, grinish blue ocean, warm and wavy with a very fine white sandy beach.
The ocean was warm and slightly wavy. We floated on the waves felt weightless like a leave on the water. We took an island tour which was very interesting. Our guid was a mixed American/Dominican with american accent. We went to a local coffee and cocoa plantations. The farm was family owned who were happy to have visitors. One of the family member I think the father cut the cocoa fruit in half. It was full of seeds with a soft white cover.He told us to eat the cover which was sweet and sour and inside was find a cocoa been. That was what they would dry later and pack to go. Our guid told us that these family are doing ok in this area financially. He gave us a tour inside their house. Basically it was very basic shelter made of wooden wall and tint roof. No shower. Washroom and kitchen was outside. The family looked simply happy.
I loved the nature, beautiful flowers. We visited a local school, had lunch in a resturant with home made food, and ended our tour with boogie riding in Macco beach.
We had different experience in Cozumel and Punta Cana. In our resort in Cozumel they had entertainment every night, which was always related to their local culture, dance, music, etc. But in Punta Cana it was mostly western specially music of eighties or nineties. Even in a shuttle to airport the music was Bee Gees, Donna Summer, etc. There was king of sense on humor in different individual (local people) we met in Punta Cana. In both country where we went, sellers were eagerly try to force you to buy something from them but in Punta Cana this was much more aggressive. Even when Nima and I were walking to get fresh air if there was any store around the seller would come out and shout to attract your attention.

I shared some photos from the beautiful nature around.

Beyond A Reasonable Doubt

We can afford to have a criminal, walking freely in the street but we can not afford having an innocent person behind the bars.

WHO UNLEASHED YOU GUYS THIS TIME???

I am shocked. Everyday there is a new bad news related to Iran and it is getting even worse. I am worried about my people. The nice Iranian who haven't had a single day of peace for the last 30 something years.
I am worried. But it's not going to help my people.
I read in a news about "The attack on the British Embassy in Tehran". THIS IS A SHOW. These are not ordinary Iranian people. These are BASIJI, a paramilitary militia who get order from Islamic Regime. Who unleashed them this time???
They don't represent Iranian not even close. But we don't represent ourselves either. Iranian came to street 33 years ago wishing for freedom and ended up with Islamic regime. Iranian came to street two years ago with their heart broken of lies and frauds, screamed for freedom again. Several civilian imprisoned or killed, the president called people " angry hooligans" who can't face the election loss.

Sanctions one after another make people's life miserable. Those who can immigrate they don't hesitate and those who stuck in there are doomed to bear all these sanctions either from the regime or from international forces.
The irony is many of those who are part of the Islamic regime in Iran come and find shelter here in Canada or other countries. Many of them are here in Toronto, buying luxurious houses. This is disgusting. This is unfair. But who makes things fare. Not someone from the sky it has to be ordinary people like me, like you, If we feel things are not justice.

Mailman finally came to our door. Brought me my offer letter. I am changing my job, I am taking a new path in my career. I am simply happy. I was smiling all day for no reason. I know no where is perfect but I am certain it was just on time to leave my current work. It was doing no good to my career anymore, just waste of time and talent. I am ready to step in a new path. Wish me luck.

Farewell Debbie

My colleage has been killed in a car accident last saturday. Today in the office when her close freind called and gave us a news we were all shocked. ""Debbie had a car accident she couldn't make it". Another colleague of mine said. I was in a lab playing with some rock cores.
The irnoy is always and always in response to " goodbye Debbie"  she would say "Drive Safe".
I miss her. She was a sweet sweet girl. A single mom. What would happen to her son?
rest in piece Deb. I miss you.

How happy are you at work? What kind of reasons give you stresses? Deadlines? Jerk manager? Jerk co-workers? Load work? Work security?
If you own a business and responsible to hire people how would you hire? what would be your criteria?
If I open my business one day, for me the most important things is have a descent environment. I believe someone who is working overtime but has a healthy mentality is much more efficient than someone who struggles with stress. I think mental exhaustion is much worse than physical. You can take care of your physical tiredness by sleeping for few hours but you can't get rid of your stresses that easy.
Good quality work needs good healthy mind. So my main focus will be on hiring nice descent people rather than anything else. You can always train the person with positive attitude but no matter how hard you try a jerk is a jerk. It doesn't matter that the jerk work performance is good or bad I believe the amount of damage that person can impose on other colleagues do more harm than good.
 If one day I opened my own bussiness ..If...

Open or Close

What kind of office environment do you prefer? open or closed?
Open concept means 2 to three and in my case 6 people share a space at work. You have your own desk but no walls. In closed concept you either have your own room (which is barely a case for most of staff) or you have your own cubicle.
In our office the open concept dose not work for me. Where I sit there are few people who really mistake the office with the coffee shop. All day long you can hear giggling, chit chatting, non-stop. Some days they talk (specially one of them) in a way that you think if they stop talking they might die.  I was talking with another colleague of mine who was upset with this open concept too. He told me the way these poeple act you and I looked like an anti-social creatures, by Sitting on our chair, facing toward screen and working for 8 hours a day.
If we are working in an open concept environment  we should/we must respect each other. Instead of chit chatting all day long or taking care of our personal businesses on the phone, we should keep it quite for those who bother working.
I told about these things to my husband and he was shocked. He told me in their office people barely talk together about non-related work stuff.
Our previouse manager once send these gang an e-mail and warned them about their behaviour but then he leftt. Now we have new manager. But considering when he is around they keep it down. I don't know how long it would take for him to find out what is going on.
I know myself. If I am so annoyed by the level of unprofessional behaviour of some of my colleages it can't be only me. Sometimes I decide to speak up but then I am telling to myself wait for the good news.

My parents went back. Nima and I started our routine which for now is watching one episode of Downton Abbey every night thanks to my lovely sister in-law who introduced the series.
I am waiting for a news. waitting makes time passes very slowly. Come on mailman bring my letter :). I can't wait ...

GUESS WHAT...

My Parents are here. It's a first time they come to Canada for a visit. Last time I saw them was more than two years a ago. They are here for less than a month and I took the whole time off. The weather has been kind to us here in Toronto for October. We visited Niagara Falls first. They loved the place. It was a beautiful sunny day and  a gorgeous rainbow was painted in sky. May parents was stunned with Falls beauty. The first night they arrived  we opened the suitcases, one after another full of good goodies for us. Local wheat bread smell so good made me feel that I'm in the heaven and I can'r describe the taste. Few walnuts, few oranges and tangerines from my grandpa garden. I am blessed.

I was driving to work this morning listening to CBC radio when I heard the story of this woman from Montreal. She is a survivor from Holocaust, 97 years old. She donated her jacket to the Montreal Holocaust Memorial Center. It was a jacket that she was forced to wear while she was in a camp. In her interview she said something really nice. She said whenever I was upset from everyday matter of life I looked at this jacket and I felt better.

I think all of us need to have a jacket, something to remind ourselves not to be upset for every silly thing in life.
Photo is from here.

Give Me Some Time

You know I have a feeling that there is this lesson I should take. Life is making me face it over and over again to take it. I am afraid I might fail again...

Fruits of Life - Part I

It has been in my head for a while to write about different people who came to my book of life and affected me in a positive or negative way. I believe we should dare to talk about what we think of each other more often. I believe we should be more open to hear what other think about us. People come and go, some scratch us, some leave a deep scare, some heal our old wounds made by other and some just pass by like the air, no influence nothings. Every relationship that we make is like a fruit, some are sweet, some are sour, some are bitter like a bitter melon, and some are tasteless. I want to write about people who has influenced me in a positive or a negative way.
I always think every individual has a  patience bowl. something like a balloon (expandable you  know). Every time we made acquaintance with someone automatically we designate a spot inside that bowl under that person's name. As we get a long if that person does something that we don't like his/her balloon grows. If the person keep annoys you the balloon tagged his/her name will explode and that's a day that you just had enough and cant take it anymore. Now if you want to designate new balloon to that person, or you want to cut the relationship is your decision.
I want to start with a friendship that I ended up for the first time in my life. When I was younger I would never even think of braking up with anyone let alone cutting the relationship for good (I am talking about simple friendship not romantic stuff). But at the age of 25 for the first time in my life I reached to the point of explosion. The balloon exploded and I knew I would never designate another balloon for that person. I learned something knew about myself. I saw my limits. After years of friendship I felt I am fed up. I don't want to make a list of things and events that ended my friendship. All I can say is that we were totally different people , different personality with few things in common. I find that person very jealous. This former friend of mine told me once that everything she/he achieved in her/his life is because there was always someone  around that make her/him jealous. She/he studied/worked hard  to be ahead of that person. years passed that I realized I can't change his/her character. I am wasting a precious energy and time on someone who is not a friend but a pathetic competitor. I was tired of dishonest attitude, bitter tongue, continuous jealousy, constant competition in every things, studying, career, social life, etc. After 7 years I had enough. I killed the relationship and never regret it for a second. What I really regret is that I wish I would spend all those years with a real friend. I did make very good and close friends within those years but I wish I wouldn't wasted my energy, heart, time on some who didn't worth a penny of my friendship. What that event changed in me is that I became very impatient and alarmed toward similar attitude from people. Now if I see anything slightly similar I would never consider getting close in first place. Now is this a bad or a good thing. I don't know. Should I blamed that relationship for being less patient or it would happen to me anyway as I grow older. I don't know.
...to be continued